Sunday, November 29, 2009 @ 7:52 AM: Friendships
Sometimes some stuff I may take it really hard, cos I really think and work my best for some organisation or people or event...
But when things are not reciprocated, I just get that sense of dl-ness...
Why am I always bothering to put in so much effort? Sometimes even more effort and sacrificing my own interest for the better good of everyone and not recognised? My mum would always laugh at how foolish I am, and would always ask me how many friends would do that for me... At the end of the day, ppl might even think i have evil motives up my sleeves...
Despite such reminders all over the place, I still believe in the principle that I have always held over friendships and whatever i do... I was glad that these days I had some friends to confide in and really know my character well (wow some I do not exactly know), and I was pleasantly surprised by some friend's intuitive insight into my thoughts about friendships, and gave me the advice of not expecting too high about others. Me having gone thru the leadership positions would have treated some stuff with different sensitivity and big picture in mind, but leadership styles are varied, and adapting is important. I have no qualms regarding different leadership styles, but sometimes being totally statistic or cold or analytical about events is just not the thing for me. I just feel human touch should always be there, and what's the point of organising an event just to organise a good one? After all, it is the interpersonal relations which are the most important!
Meanwhile really, there's no point trying hard and making myself upset. As seen in a recent biochem essay practice, I've finally got a better mark with a slacker essay compared to essays I have put in so much time to research... Perhaps it is time to involve myself less and being able to withdraw myself to avoid hurt. And meanwhile I shall be on my hunt for meaningful friendships and relations
thank you for bringing me memories...
Monday, November 23, 2009 @ 5:09 AM:
一言惊醒梦中人
michaelmas 现在正式开始！
thank you for bringing me memories...
Saturday, November 21, 2009 @ 6:06 AM: Songs collection (Looping in my comp for days!)
陪你等天亮
眼看星星落下
窗外一点一点出现阳光
抚摸我的头
你说我很怕
我们都是这样
一面带着伤痕一面飞翔
难过的时候 有我在身旁我陪你等天亮
拥抱着一起分享
能放心的哭一场
是再微笑的力量
只有你明白我的疯狂
不管故事有多长世界对我太善良
这一路上有你
我变得坚强
你知道我多傻（其实我也很傻）
在你面前从来不用逞强
听我说说话
让我靠一下我们都是这样（都是这样）
想要幸福却都跌跌撞撞（跌跌撞撞）
可是不要怕 有我在身旁
你才看见（看见）
我早已经学会
就算逆风
也能好好带着祝福不再流泪勇敢地飞
然后分享那种喜悦（那种喜悦）
遗憾 许美静
别再说是谁的错
让一切成灰
除非放下心中的负累
一切难以挽回
你总爱让往事跟随
怕过去白费
你总以为要体会人生
就要多爱几回
与其让你在我怀中枯萎
宁愿你犯错后悔
让你飞向梦中的世界
留我独自伤悲与其让你在我爱中憔悴
宁愿你受伤流泪
莫非要你尝尽了苦悲
才懂真情可贵
thank you for bringing me memories...
Wednesday, November 18, 2009 @ 12:52 AM:
A smile can make someone's day.
No matter what sort of smile is that, I will just take that.
thank you for bringing me memories...
Saturday, November 14, 2009 @ 4:45 AM: Time flies indeed!
Just as I was talking to Caleb, he couldn't believe he is coming to Cambridge tml for Oxbridge games, and I feel exactly the same as well! Lots of things happened just within these days, and somehow when u are busy all the while, there is hardly time to reflect...
I was reading Classics in Total Synthesis II, and right in the introduction chapter: "After all, every molecule, just like a person, is the unique sum of its individual parts. Its physical characteristics, its personality if you will, emerge from the specific combination of its atoms, bonds and stereocenters;
to remove or alter just one of these items would be essentially the same as a close friend transforming into a complete stranger." I reckoned that particular incident had hit quite hard at me from the start of term, and while I could do nothing about some issues, I'm perhaps just disappointed at the way things turn out. Too many questions, perhaps the best answer is no answer.
On the other hand, there had been pple who had shown an "interesting" side about them which I really wonder what to say about them. Sometimes we may curse at what the army does, but one impt thing it does is to make you see how things really work and for me, I have developed a greater interest into how pple think, what they will think and their attitudes compared to the past. Anyway a good chat has brought me some questions... Does the pot calling the kettle black really help things (I mean one should always take a good look at YOURSELF before commenting on others)? Adding really unnecessary comments without thinking? Sometimes we may be so prone to making such silly mistakes or just overlook your own self and think you're perfect, but it is a timely reminder as the way it is.
Essentially this shall bring me to my msn message "Some people are not worth it, some are." I know some friends are there to help and are warm and would always seek to think from your point of view; others just make use of you as part of their chasing for ever more portfolios or good results. Some friends would always lend you their shoulders to lie on when you are sad, while some would ditch you and ignore you completely while begging for your help when it arises, with the "thanks" from the mouth and the eyes showing otherwise. Body language speaks a lot. Everyday action speaks volumes. And saying "You are my big saviour" only after getting ur help just appears so fake.
I wouldn't want to misplace my trust into friends who do not deserve it, while I am always grateful to those who have been so ever truthful and believe in friendships.
thank you for bringing me memories...
